Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Hard Ride To Hell (2010)

Bikers and horror are two things that has been done several times. One of the best loved examples is the 1975 classic "Race With The Devil" starring Peter Fonda, with the British oddity "Psychomania" right behind it. It makes sense really-hot rides and horror elements mixed together sounds like a fun mix, and in the right hands it can be. Unfortunately, "Hard Ride to Hell" isn't a fun movie at all.

A group of family and friends (including "Ginger Snaps" star and all around attractive lady Katherine Isabelle) are on an camping trip through Texas. Well, it seems that buddy Dirk (Brandon Jay McLaren) witnesses a ritual being performed by a Satanic Biker Gang led by a one eyed creep named Jefé (Miguel Ferrer), and the next thing you know, they are being pursued by these heretic hog-riders.

"Hard Ride to Hell" comes from Vivendi, a studio that gave us the already reviewed "Backwoods." Unlike that movie, this movie actually delivers in the gore and nudity department, with hunks of flesh being bitten off, arms being lopped off with a chainsaw, and more nasty surprises. Sadly, that's all it has going for it. Like what? Well, at least "Backwoods" had passable performances. Ferrer, who is usually a great actor, here phones it in, looking like he's about to fall asleep at any given moment, and seems like he's only there for a paycheck. Isabelle does a fine job for a while-until the third act comes in, and she inexplicably becomes a cowardly comic relief character. There's no reason given as to why-it just happens, and it's so abrupt that it comes off a really lazy writing.

The biggest problem though, is that director Penelope Buitenhuis (herself a veteran of directing TV productions) and the writers have no idea what made the movies they are paying tribute to (the aforementioned "Race With the Devil" in particular) so great. They think "Hey, tits and violence is what the people want!" However, they forget it takes more than that for a movie like this to work. You need something that really stands out, and this has almost nothing that stands out. The third act gives the viewer a few fun moments, but it ends up feeling like "From Dusk Till Dawn"-if that movie was really bad and felt like it was made for the ScyFy channel.

It's too bad, because with better direction, acting and writing, this could have been a fun time. Instead, it's nothing but a pretender to the throne. Skip it.

Rating: 2/10

No comments:

Post a Comment