Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Dinocroc vs. Supergator (2010)

I've gone out of my way to avoid reviewing any of the "_______ vs. _______" movies that the SyFy Channel has offered. Unlike say, something like an old Kaiju flick like "Godzilla vs. Mothra", there's no real fun or excitement going on. Just plenty of dull mediocrity and usually forced attempts at campy humor, not to mention terrible CG effects and less than satisfactory final battles between the beasts. Well, I caved in and decided to review "Dinocroc vs. Supergator", but only because it was produced by Roger Corman and directed by Corman regular/Cinemax fave Jim Wynorski. Too bad the end result isn't that different.

Jason Drake (David Carradine) runs a genetics lab that produces a growth serum, which he thinks should be tested on animals. This of course, turns out to be another example of man tampering with what he shouldn't, as it produces a giant gator and a dinosaur-crocodile hybrid (how that last part is possible is beyond me) that break loose and decide to snack on some people. To clean that up, he sends in some soldiers, who end up becoming gator chum. So, he sends a hot British gal named Victoria (Auerelia Parsons) and a guy known as "The Cajun" (Rib Hillis) to clean things up. To make things worse for Drake, he's being investigated by a goverment spy named Paul Beaumont (Cory Landis) and a hot but inappropriately dressed Parks and Recreations officer who sadly doesn't come from Pawnee, and is named Cassidy (Amy Rassimas.)

Long story short: people are munched on, assassinations are attempted, and the Dinocroc and the Supergator will duke it out.

Before I get on with the review, I want to mention that while I find conspiracy theories abhorrent and stupid, I'm starting to doubt that David Carradine is actually dead. Dude was pronounced dead like two years ago, yet he keeps showing up in movies. Maybe he faked his death, has done a few appearances in B-Movies, and now lives somewhere in the Philippines where he does a lot of cocaine and has a harem of underage prostitutes.

Anyways, I'll give the movie this much: it does feature moments of Wynorski's trademark campy humor (I actually got a few laughs out of this), as well as his love of lovingly filming women in skimpy bikinis. Sadly, no female nudity, but this is a Scy-Fy Channel movie. I also kinda dug the score by Chuck Cirino and Al and Jon Kaplan, which appropriately features some twangy guitar riffs.

Apart from that, there's really nothing to praise about this movie. The acting is all around awful, Carradine simply shows up a few times and seems bored. The gore is done via badly done CG, and there's only a few kills that stand out, as most of them are pretty lame. Most of the characters (including a rather pointless movie producer) exist only to become monster food. The final battle is pretty one-sided, not to mention boring and far too brief. Then there's the fact that this whole thing is illogical even by SyFy Channel standards. How is it possible to do a dinosaur-crocodile hybrid? Why would anybody want to do create such a thing? Exactly why are they experimenting on animals? What in God's name is with the movie producer character? Why are the Dinocroc and the Supergator fighting? Nothing is really explained, and none of it makes any sense, which makes for a confusing experience.

There isn't a lot that differentiates from the usual SyFy Channel movie here. There's no attention paid to logic, the effects are bad, the acting is mostly dull, and it's rarely that exciting. I've seen worse from them, but this is still lazy, uninteresting garbage.

Rating: 2.5/10

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