Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Goblin (2010)

To be honest, I didn't want to do a review tonight. October was fun, but after reviewing twenty something movies for that month, I figured "Hey, you could use a break!" Well, so much for that, as I'm reviewing the SyFy Channel movie "Goblin."

The movie actually starts out promisingly enough, opening on Halloween of 1831. Here, the townspeople throw the deformed baby of the town witch into a fire. Of course, they are now cursed, and the baby-which was a Goblin (obviously) now feeds on babies every Halloween. Cut to present day, where the Perkins family are moving into town, and what do ya know, it's Halloween, and the monster is hungry.

If there are any bright spots to be found, it's the fact that the kills are surprisingly gory for a TV movie, and character actor Gil Bellows does a fine job as the father. That's about all I can say that's positive though, because "Goblin" is a bore to sit through. The monster is a bit lame, and is never convincing with the bad CG effects enhancements they offer. In fact, none of the CG effects looks any good, and wouldn't look out of place in a bad video game with cheap graphics. Even the direction by Jeffery Scott Lando* (so where's Han Solo?) is uninspired, and offers nothing that distinguishes itself from other ScyFy Channel movies.

Then there's the mythology of the film. The movie is actually rife with potential on what it could do with the monster's back story-how did it come to be, what could it's connection to the woman who feeds it-but the answers you get are everything you've seen before. This is a movie that lacks inspiration, and tends to be dull even by ScyFy Channel standards. At least some of the channel's movies can be watchable in a cheesy way. This is just boring and nondescript.

Unless you are a hardcore SyFy Channel movie junkie, you don't need to bother with "Goblin." This is nothing that you haven't seen from the channel before, and done better in the past believe it or not.

Rating: 2/10

*Lando's prior directorial credits include the giant bug movie "Insceticidal", the vampire movie "Thirst" (which is in no way related to the great Korean vampire movie), the backwoods horror movie "Savage Island" (which I remember some praising a while back) and the sequel "Decoys 2: Alien Seduction" (which had Tobin Bell.) He's also done the TV movies "House of Bones" and "Super Tanker."

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